Well today was a weigh in day, and it was a tough one. I am back up to 200 lbs, I did not take measurements because I was all too focused on the positive change that I saw on the scale. I am really frustrated with myself for gaining back some weight, but I also have to remember that my whole schedule has been turned upside down since classes ended. Workouts have been hard to keep constant and eating has turned to grazing because I have nothing to do!
In honor of my messed up schedule I ran on a rest day. But unlike the last few runs, I completed the full mile of running at the end rather than run/walking it. This made today feel like less of a failure and more of an accomplishment. I am starting to see that the Shamrock Run is not just a dream, I am making progress towards a successful run and I am able to watch the times drop towards my goal of a sub 30 minute race.
One thing that has really been making these last two weeks hard is pain in my lower back. My sister, took a quick look at me and had some great observations into why my back may be hurting and why my right foot hurts when I am running. It seems that my right leg is almost an inch longer than my left. CRAZY!!! I finally have some sort of idea as to why my body deals with the stress of running so adversely. I am super excited to make an appointment with a prospective new DO in Corvallis to talk about how to remedy my problem.
I realize that the scale is saying one thing, but the track is saying another. I am getting fitter, I am making progress, and even though spring break might not be the date of completion I will make my goal of 150 lbs.
Q: What song gets you in the mood to shred on your workout?
A: "When I'm Alone"- remixed by Klaypex, The most amazing song to put on your running playlist. It will change your life, and if it doesn't... well.. you are probably dead anyway.
Oh, shout out to my #1 cuz! ya'll know who you are ;)
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Getting Back on the Horse
I learned how to ride horses very young in life and got to hear the saying "get back on the horse" a few too many times. I have had a couple rough days to start this week, and it caused me to not want to write blog posts because I felt so bad about it. I "fell" off the diet and workout plan on Sunday and stayed dismounted for two days. I finally got myself together on wednesday and went to crossfit and ate correctly. I am really bummed with myself because of my three day hiatus. I feel that to be successful in this I have to stick with it and stay on the freaking horse! Falling off can't happen too often, and getting back on better happen really quick to avoid steps backward in progress.
Getting back on the horse is hard, you feel defeated and frustrated with yourself. I felt awful the whole time about the fact that I couldn't pull myself out of the slump I was in. I think that the difficulty in staying with my routine stemmed from being done with classes and not having a set schedule to work my exercising and eating around. I am learning to pull encouragement from within myself, because even though I have a great family that supports me I still need to be able to push and motivate myself. I am always thinking about what I will look like and how I will feel when I have hit my goal weight. As I examine my own flaws I notice that I am looking at a goal that is so far away, and that I need to give myself rewards for benchmarks towards the end goals. I am so excited to buy new clothes and such, but I need to figure out what I will do for myself when I hit 175 or 160. Allowing myself to have little victories to build up to the final goal will keep me excited to see this to the end.
I am super tired and will be up tomorrow for a run, so I will leave you with a question.
Q: What is your goal, and what keeps you motivated to see it through?
Getting back on the horse is hard, you feel defeated and frustrated with yourself. I felt awful the whole time about the fact that I couldn't pull myself out of the slump I was in. I think that the difficulty in staying with my routine stemmed from being done with classes and not having a set schedule to work my exercising and eating around. I am learning to pull encouragement from within myself, because even though I have a great family that supports me I still need to be able to push and motivate myself. I am always thinking about what I will look like and how I will feel when I have hit my goal weight. As I examine my own flaws I notice that I am looking at a goal that is so far away, and that I need to give myself rewards for benchmarks towards the end goals. I am so excited to buy new clothes and such, but I need to figure out what I will do for myself when I hit 175 or 160. Allowing myself to have little victories to build up to the final goal will keep me excited to see this to the end.
I am super tired and will be up tomorrow for a run, so I will leave you with a question.
Q: What is your goal, and what keeps you motivated to see it through?
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Yeah... so it is 1:24 am the next day..
Hey all! Today (yesterday now..) was cheat day, a glorious day when I trick my body into believing that it is no longer being "starved" of calories. This day allows the metabolism to stay steady rather than crash and leave me on the plateau of dispare. Though this day sounds like a wonderful vacation from the extremely regimented diet that I have for myself, it is hard work to eat so many calories! As I have trained myself to eat only certain things 6 days a week it is really difficult to jump into a feeding frenzy, which of course costs way more than my normal food budget. This got me thinking about all of these extremely cheap people who are fat... How on earth are they able to save money if they are eating all of this processed food that costs way more than the raw basics that you actually need to survive. I spent $11.00 on a bag of Resse's Peanut Butter Cups and a pint of Ben and Jerry's. That is a quarter of my weekly food budget on two items!
Oh, the important stuff.. I almost forgot! I lost 2 pounds this week and 2.25 inches! I am at 197.5 and keeping a steady trend of weight loss that is sustainable and going to change my life! I was super excited about the inches lost because last week my right thigh was a whole inch larger than my left, this week they were the same. Totally weird I know, but my mommy does my measurements and I am pretty sure she is the person I should trust with such a duty as to get the best results! As the inches drop off I have began to think about things that I will get to go shop for. I know this sounds a little superficial, but my justification hopefully changes your mind. I have not enjoyed shopping for a very long time, unless it is online. I feel self conscious and horrible about myself when I have to go in and try on clothing because I am worried that I got a size (or two) too small. I am really excited to go shopping IN a store and have fun trying on clothing for the first time in a very long time. I can't wait to be able to look in the mirror and not want to shrink and hide from a body that doesn't reflect the soul within it. I am ready to bring what I have burning within to the outside and finally be able to accomplish things that I can't do now and have a healthier and happier body. Obviously this screams body image issues, and if this is what your mind was screaming while you were reading it was totally right. I do love myself, I just know what I am capable of if I allow myself to come out from under 47.5 pounds of garbage that is hiding me from the world. At 200 pounds I have climbed mountains, hiked, snowboarded, and tons of amazing things. My mom always says I am capable, I know I am capable, I will keep moving towards fitness and towards the goals I have set for myself.
Question for the day!!!
Q: What is one part of you (physical or character trait) that you are so glad to have?
Again, you can post your answer or just think about your answer for yourself. Either way, love that part of you.
My answer: I love my eyes, it is one part of my physical appearance that will not change through this whole transition. The phrase that says that the eyes are the gateway to the soul are totally right. I am so glad that I will be able to keep my eyes, they have seen all of my experiences, cried for my losses, and will see me through to the completion of my goals.
Good Night ya'll
Oh, the important stuff.. I almost forgot! I lost 2 pounds this week and 2.25 inches! I am at 197.5 and keeping a steady trend of weight loss that is sustainable and going to change my life! I was super excited about the inches lost because last week my right thigh was a whole inch larger than my left, this week they were the same. Totally weird I know, but my mommy does my measurements and I am pretty sure she is the person I should trust with such a duty as to get the best results! As the inches drop off I have began to think about things that I will get to go shop for. I know this sounds a little superficial, but my justification hopefully changes your mind. I have not enjoyed shopping for a very long time, unless it is online. I feel self conscious and horrible about myself when I have to go in and try on clothing because I am worried that I got a size (or two) too small. I am really excited to go shopping IN a store and have fun trying on clothing for the first time in a very long time. I can't wait to be able to look in the mirror and not want to shrink and hide from a body that doesn't reflect the soul within it. I am ready to bring what I have burning within to the outside and finally be able to accomplish things that I can't do now and have a healthier and happier body. Obviously this screams body image issues, and if this is what your mind was screaming while you were reading it was totally right. I do love myself, I just know what I am capable of if I allow myself to come out from under 47.5 pounds of garbage that is hiding me from the world. At 200 pounds I have climbed mountains, hiked, snowboarded, and tons of amazing things. My mom always says I am capable, I know I am capable, I will keep moving towards fitness and towards the goals I have set for myself.
Question for the day!!!
Q: What is one part of you (physical or character trait) that you are so glad to have?
Again, you can post your answer or just think about your answer for yourself. Either way, love that part of you.
My answer: I love my eyes, it is one part of my physical appearance that will not change through this whole transition. The phrase that says that the eyes are the gateway to the soul are totally right. I am so glad that I will be able to keep my eyes, they have seen all of my experiences, cried for my losses, and will see me through to the completion of my goals.
Good Night ya'll
Friday, December 9, 2011
Run Like Your Life Depends on it
Today was a battle to rule them all when it came time to get out of bed and go for a run. Delilah gave me tons of grief by not completing her morning potty appointment within a reasonable amount of time. Even though I woke up at 7:30 and immediately took the princess out, by the time I came back into the house it was already 8:04... this is when the struggle of whether I had time to run (or if I had the motivation or the desire to). I finally convinced myself that yes I could finish my workout with time to shower and get to my 9:30 final.
Once I got started I was so happy I went. I had woken up so grumpy, and got even more grumpy when Delilah wasn't bending to my needs of a quick potty time. I started running and those angry morning thoughts and the stubbornness regarding the physical exertion I was putting myself through slowly melted away as I listend to my AMAZING new playlist.
My dad always talks about how whenever he has a problem or an obstacle that he can't figure out, he goes for a run and the solutions just pile into his head. I never really jumped on board with that theory until I started running myself. There is something about running on a cold (27 degrees of cold) morning before you truly start the grind of your day to put all of your plans and responsibilities in order. The other advantage that I have found is that I get to have time away from facebook and texting, which I know sounds like a grown up time out... well that is actually exactly what it is. I put myself in time out, allowing myself time to reflect on yesterday and maybe solve a problem or talk myself out of getting a white mocha before my final.
So not that I am an advice guru or that anybody really reads my personal therapy session, but if you take time to put yourself in "time out" each day you are allowing yourself to be pulled away from what might seem important and give yourself time to really think about things that are happening in your life (and not your facebook life, you know, the stuff that actually matters). Take it from me, self inflicted time outs are the bee's knees and I recommend them on the highest authority as the author of this blog.
OH, I almost forgot about my fancy title for today. "Run like your life depends on it" I have decided that my life most certainly does depend on running, or any physical activity. In fact, everyone's life depends on it, because without physical activity I have learned that I am grumpy, fat, and a total couch potato.
I am adding a new piece to my little ditty here, a question. So here it goes and you are welcome to post your answer or simply just contemplate your response on your own.
Q: What does your life depend on?
Once I got started I was so happy I went. I had woken up so grumpy, and got even more grumpy when Delilah wasn't bending to my needs of a quick potty time. I started running and those angry morning thoughts and the stubbornness regarding the physical exertion I was putting myself through slowly melted away as I listend to my AMAZING new playlist.
My dad always talks about how whenever he has a problem or an obstacle that he can't figure out, he goes for a run and the solutions just pile into his head. I never really jumped on board with that theory until I started running myself. There is something about running on a cold (27 degrees of cold) morning before you truly start the grind of your day to put all of your plans and responsibilities in order. The other advantage that I have found is that I get to have time away from facebook and texting, which I know sounds like a grown up time out... well that is actually exactly what it is. I put myself in time out, allowing myself time to reflect on yesterday and maybe solve a problem or talk myself out of getting a white mocha before my final.
So not that I am an advice guru or that anybody really reads my personal therapy session, but if you take time to put yourself in "time out" each day you are allowing yourself to be pulled away from what might seem important and give yourself time to really think about things that are happening in your life (and not your facebook life, you know, the stuff that actually matters). Take it from me, self inflicted time outs are the bee's knees and I recommend them on the highest authority as the author of this blog.
OH, I almost forgot about my fancy title for today. "Run like your life depends on it" I have decided that my life most certainly does depend on running, or any physical activity. In fact, everyone's life depends on it, because without physical activity I have learned that I am grumpy, fat, and a total couch potato.
I am adding a new piece to my little ditty here, a question. So here it goes and you are welcome to post your answer or simply just contemplate your response on your own.
Q: What does your life depend on?
Thursday, December 8, 2011
The Eye of the Tiger
Well today started out in a frenzy.. How can an apartment of two college students have ZERO pencils?! I woke up at 7, threw on my most attractive sweats and puffy jacket and busted over to Freddy's to get some pencils. The A&P final whooped my under prepared butt like a nun at a 'yo mama..' contest. Coming out of the exam room I felt awful. This class wasn't just for a grade, it was an opportunity to go see somewhere new and exciting to complete my paramedic. I called my mom who of course simply said get up and brush yourself off (we're proud of you) move on to the next final and find a new path to Alaska.
I got home and still felt awful, I went and got my run/walking duds on and went out for a 3 mile think session with me, myself, and I. My legs were moving so fast it felt like they were going to pop off after the torture they went through last night. Sore and in a pity party I kept moving listening to the most corny work out song of them all, you guessed it... THE eye of the Tiger. Laughing at my poor music selection I felt a little less depressed about the test and was starting to move past it as the miles went on. Today I graduated from a 1/2 mile of running to 1 mile of running. The fact that I had to come to grips with was that I was not going to be able to run this mile right off the bat, and that I will have to work up to it just like I did with the 1/2 mile and anything else I have done right in my life. It was hard to convince myself to start running again when I hit the first wall, but somehow a voice inside my head out-yelled my sore legs and bursting lungs. Even though it was a run/walk mile I ended this run at 41:44, slicing just over 3 minutes off from yesterdays run of 45:18.
Yesterday was my first blog posting, and tons of people were very encouraging and supportive of what I am doing. If you are working towards a goal and having a hard time keeping yourself motivated start a blog or some sort of measurable data keeping to be able to look back on and see the progress you have made. I really appreciate all of you who are reading, even if you don't leave comments I appreciate that you are taking time to support me by reading what I have to say.
Thanks!
I got home and still felt awful, I went and got my run/walking duds on and went out for a 3 mile think session with me, myself, and I. My legs were moving so fast it felt like they were going to pop off after the torture they went through last night. Sore and in a pity party I kept moving listening to the most corny work out song of them all, you guessed it... THE eye of the Tiger. Laughing at my poor music selection I felt a little less depressed about the test and was starting to move past it as the miles went on. Today I graduated from a 1/2 mile of running to 1 mile of running. The fact that I had to come to grips with was that I was not going to be able to run this mile right off the bat, and that I will have to work up to it just like I did with the 1/2 mile and anything else I have done right in my life. It was hard to convince myself to start running again when I hit the first wall, but somehow a voice inside my head out-yelled my sore legs and bursting lungs. Even though it was a run/walk mile I ended this run at 41:44, slicing just over 3 minutes off from yesterdays run of 45:18.
Yesterday was my first blog posting, and tons of people were very encouraging and supportive of what I am doing. If you are working towards a goal and having a hard time keeping yourself motivated start a blog or some sort of measurable data keeping to be able to look back on and see the progress you have made. I really appreciate all of you who are reading, even if you don't leave comments I appreciate that you are taking time to support me by reading what I have to say.
Thanks!
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
1st post, definitely not the last
I first want to explain why I am writing a daily blog about myself, I want to lose 50 pounds by springbreak 2012. This is the short term goal, my long term goal is a lifetime of fitness and a happier and healthier me because of it. I started this "quest" about two weeks ago and have decided that each Saturday I will take pictures, measurements, and weight to track my weekly progress. I started this journey towards fitness at 204 lbs. and this last Saturday (12/3) I weighed in at 199.5, 4.5 lost in about a week and a half!
How I am doing it:
Crossfit 2 times a week
running 5 days a week
eating ridiculously healthy (to be ridiculously good looking of course)
Now, the main problem that people (myself included) have with a fitness and eating plans is that they are simply not sustainable or they just don't have any "skin in the game". I am the later of the two, I just didn't have the drive to make a change before a few weeks ago. Like all things in my life, I ignored the impending doom of my own lack of fitness and covered up my problems with other things (food). I became depressed and angry with myself that I couldn't make a change, and if I did, I would simply give up on it in a few days when it got hard. I hid behind humor, usually involving myself. A few weeks ago I started listening to what I was saying to others about how I looked, if I was listening to somebody talking about themselves like that I would feel so bad for them. I knew right then I had to make a change.
I set goals!
1- I want to be 150 lbs. by spring break (Red Rocks BABY!!!)
2- I want to RUN not run/walk a 5k (first distance run I have ever done)
3- I want to look smokin hot for Summer and Bruce's wedding this summer
4- (the long term goal) I want to be fit, climb mountains, and live (healthy) for a very long time.
Goal progress
1- 49.5 lbs. to go
2- signed up for the Shamrock Run March 18th
3- Starting to think about cute summer hair styles for the July wedding :)
4- Trip planned to hike the Oregon PCT with my dad summer 2012
I realize this first post is packed full of whys and whats, but I feel like I should lay a proper foundation to build upon each day. I want people to know what I went through to finally get my goals and make a plan.
I forgot todays workouts!
7:45 am- 3 miles (.5 running)@ 45:17
6:30 pm- Crossfit- 1/2 Barbra- 3 sets of 20 rows, 30 pushups, 40 sit-ups, 50 squats for time @20:52
How I am doing it:
Crossfit 2 times a week
running 5 days a week
eating ridiculously healthy (to be ridiculously good looking of course)
Now, the main problem that people (myself included) have with a fitness and eating plans is that they are simply not sustainable or they just don't have any "skin in the game". I am the later of the two, I just didn't have the drive to make a change before a few weeks ago. Like all things in my life, I ignored the impending doom of my own lack of fitness and covered up my problems with other things (food). I became depressed and angry with myself that I couldn't make a change, and if I did, I would simply give up on it in a few days when it got hard. I hid behind humor, usually involving myself. A few weeks ago I started listening to what I was saying to others about how I looked, if I was listening to somebody talking about themselves like that I would feel so bad for them. I knew right then I had to make a change.
I set goals!
1- I want to be 150 lbs. by spring break (Red Rocks BABY!!!)
2- I want to RUN not run/walk a 5k (first distance run I have ever done)
3- I want to look smokin hot for Summer and Bruce's wedding this summer
4- (the long term goal) I want to be fit, climb mountains, and live (healthy) for a very long time.
Goal progress
1- 49.5 lbs. to go
2- signed up for the Shamrock Run March 18th
3- Starting to think about cute summer hair styles for the July wedding :)
4- Trip planned to hike the Oregon PCT with my dad summer 2012
I realize this first post is packed full of whys and whats, but I feel like I should lay a proper foundation to build upon each day. I want people to know what I went through to finally get my goals and make a plan.
I forgot todays workouts!
7:45 am- 3 miles (.5 running)@ 45:17
6:30 pm- Crossfit- 1/2 Barbra- 3 sets of 20 rows, 30 pushups, 40 sit-ups, 50 squats for time @20:52
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